Wednesday, January 28, 2009

How Do You Say, "I hate ironing" in French?

I'm all for the little details, for nice touches that equal perfection. I really am. That being said, I'd rather not spend forty-five minutes ironing every single table cloth in the dining room. Especially when that means we can't set anything on the tables until that job is done. I guess it's the restaurant's version of a New Year's resolution. Maybe they think that by smoothing out the creases on the linen, the creases in our own service will somehow improve as well.

I have enough trouble ironing my own shirt properly. There's always some crease that I can't get out, some wrinkly patch that I'll inevitably miss. Half the time I'm creating creases where there were none, or burning myself with the steam button. (Even though I kind of like the noise it makes, a friendly little hiss.) I tried to explain this to my co-worker when he got all huffy after I said, "You're not done with that yet? Hurry up, I need to set this section!" and he passed the iron my way in a "Let's see if you can do it faster, then." kind of challenge.

I attempted to avert the chore with a feminist argument (Just because I'm a woman, you think I'll be good at the ironing??) but he was having none of it.

"Who do I look like, the Iron Woman!?"

"Sorry, I have some other pressing issues to attend to..."

I stated my past history of all things heated - the scar on my neck from the curling iron, the blister on my hand from the straightener, a somewhat exaggerated mishap with the sandwich press - but by this time I was actually just talking to myself.

Choosing to strike while the iron was hot, I smoothed things out with my co-worker.

3 comments:

Sarah said...

Oh Uncle M, queen of the puns. I love you.

Sebastian Anthony said...

I'll have to try some punning tomorrow, just to prove I can do it as well as you!

There was this great fashion, a few years ago, where you had to crinkle your shirts. You had to tie them up and stuff, before you washed them.

Man, I loved those times...

Errant Gosling said...

Made me smile, as always. There is one brand of shirts I buy precisely because they never need to be ironed, yet are someone still %100 percent cotton. I am useless with an iron.